10. Guilt

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

dedicated to: raindrop06 my newest follower and liker.

We heard a loud thud followed by a moan of pain. We looked at each other questioningly, hearts in our mouths, before rushing to see what had happened.

We found mummy sprawled on the floor. She had tripped on a cricket ball. The same cricket ball I threw at Khalid’s head this morning amongst other things. I was really mad at him this morning.

We tried helping mummy up but she said “Ouch, leave me I think I hurt my leg. Just call daddy please.” I was just numb and freaked out. Totally lost about what to do. I’m just so happy Basheera and Hafsa were here. Basheera phoned daddy and Khalid while Hafsa was trying her best to make mummy comfortable, bringing for her water and encouraging her to read the dua for pain.

Place your hand at the site of the pain and say:
3x بِسْمِ اللهِ

7x أَعُوذُ بِاللهِ وَقُدْرَتِهِ مِنْ شَرِّ مَا أَجِدُ وَأُحَاذِرُ

In the name of Allah.I seek refuge with Allah and His power from the evil of what I feel and that which I am wary of

I was just standing frozen in shock. Our rock, my vibrant and amazing mother was now looking quite weak and frail, and like she was in alot of pain. Mummy was the one who we always looked to for guidance and help, the one always directing us and advising us whenever we felt lost. In situations like this mummy was generally the one who I explained all my troubles to and the one soothed all my fears. Mummy was the one who generally directed us when difficult situations arose so that there’s no further problems and confusion.

I felt so guilty. It was my fault. I had thrown that ball at Khalid this morning and I didn’t keep it away, now mummy had tripped over the same ball. It wasn’t just an ordinary fall because mummy couldn’t get up. Even attempting it caused her excruciating pain. There was definitely something wrong. Mummy had quite a high tolerance for pain, so for the pain to actually be showing on her face it had to be quite severe. What if mummy broke her leg and could never walk again. It would be all my fault.

Alhamdulillah daddy finally got here. Daddy carried mummy to the car telling Basheera to phone her parents to come pick us up and he’ll come fetch us when they know what’s wrong.

Why didn’t they take me with? The minutes passed by like hours. I felt like a zombie. The guilt was eating me. After a few hours which felt like years daddy phoned to say that mummy will stay in hospital overnight and visiting hours were at 7:00 pm- 8:00 pm. Finally! Finally I would know if mummy was okay, finally I would know what was going on, finally I hoped the guilt will abate, finally I can see mummy.




Just aspiring to inspire through the pen, or should I say, keyboard. May Allah Ta’ala accept my efforts and make it a source of Hidayah for the Ummah.

4 thoughts on “10. Guilt

  1. MashaAllah sister. Came across your blogs yesterday. You doing a great job. May Allah guide you in your writing and continue using you as a means of guidance for others.
    Lovely post. Wonder what happened to her mum…hope it’s nothing serious…either way I’m sure that there’s a lesson for her to learn…
    Shukran for the dedication 💜💙💛💚

    Liked by 1 person

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