32. I was totally out of my depth.

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

Dedicated to A for always liking and for quickly notifying me of that terrible mistake. 

What I saw made me freeze with horror. I was appalled. For a moment I thought my eyes were deceiving me. I mean this was completely heinous, scandalous and inhumane. How could they do that especially being muslimahs. Even boys are not this unscrupulous and underhanded. “Astaghfirullah! What in the world in going on here,” were the words that escaped my mouth, before my mind could even register that I may have just made the situation worse.

I had over heard the teachers speaking about a bullying problem going on the grade seven class but I never thought it was this bad. Infact I don’t think the teachers even knew how bad it has gotten.

Even though the teachers knew what was going on, action was never taken because I live a corrupt country and school in a just as corrupt school. Between the bully and the bullied, one girls father donated huge amounts of money to the school monthly while the other girl’s mother was the school secretary as well as substitute teacher.

The sight before my eyes is one, if I hadn’t witnessed with my own eyes I myself wouldn’t have believed. I had thought the bullying was typical girly conflicts and verbal abuse (not that that’s to be taken lightly)  but I had never in my wildest imagination imagined a scenario like this. I was totally out of my depth. I didn’t know what to do. I felt very lost.

All the girls were ganged up on one girl and physically fighting with her. Who stoops that low? How can 15 or so people be ganged up on one person and do you what the craziest part was? On hearing me speak they all froze in shock and as my question registered every single one of them looked confused as if they themselves didn’t even know why they were fighting. They each turned to the next person for that answer.

Is this what peer pressure led to? Did each of these girls not have a mind of their own? What had led them to doing such a sickening act? Were they simply going along with the flow? Were they joining in out of fear that if they didn’t do so they themselves would become the new victim? The answers to these questions only they can answer.

I eventually noticed that there were only 3 girls out of the lot of them who didn’t look as confused as the rest. The bullied, the girl who I assume is the main bully considering the angry look on her face and another girl who hadn’t joined in all this drama but sat quietly in one corner this entire time eating her lunch with a forlorn expression on her face.

I examined the girl who they were bullying for any sign of physical injuries and was relieved to find none. Whether this was because these girls were extremely weak and didn’t know how to fight or whether I had come before the real fight could break out I don’t know.

After a minute of pin drop silence, the girl who I had assumed started this whole thing burst into tears and quavered out, “She always has it in for me! She has to one up me at everything! She beat me in the exams last term, she bought the same pencil-case as me, my mummy even loves her more than she loves me because she’s always comparing me to her, and now she’s stealing my best friend!”

I just gaped at her for a few seconds unsure how to react. What was I supposed to say? Being a tomboy who had more guy friends than girl friends I never really had to deal with issues like this before.

I was lost. Lost as to what to think, what to say and how to react. I just could not take any more of this drama. Unable to come to a decision I found my legs reacting before my mind could. I ran and I ran trying to escape this nightmare only to find myself in a bigger nightmare. Where on earth was I?

وعن أبي موسى رضي الله عنه قال‏:‏ قلت‏:‏ يا رسول الله أي المسلمين أفضل‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ ‏ “‏من سلم المسلمون من لسانه ويده‏”‏‏.‏ ‏(‏‏(‏متفق عليه‏)‏‏)‏‏.‏

Abu Musa Al-Ash’ari (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I asked the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ): “Who is the most excellent among the Muslims?” He said, “One from whose tongue and hands the other Muslims are safe from.”
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

If you were put in a situation like this how would you react? In some bullying situations the adults don’t care and in others they unintentionally tend to make the bullying worse. What are possible measures to alleviate or better yet put an end to bullying besides telling an adult? 

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Author:

Just 2 sisters aspiring to inspire through the pen, or should I say, keyboard. May Allah Ta’ala accept our efforts and make it a source of Hidayah for the Ummah.

6 thoughts on “32. I was totally out of my depth.

  1. Jazaakallah for the dedication
    Beautiful post with lovely lessons, just goes to show that a child’s self esteem can be damaged by their parents continuous critism and comparing them to other children which in turn leads to them becoming bullies
    Hope Khawla manages to find a way to help the bully

    Liked by 1 person

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